The characteristics of a healthy relationship involve having open dialogue and honest communication with your partner. However, achieving this can take a lifetime of constant work and effort as conflicts can arise and meanings can get lost in translation.
Whether you like to talk or remain silent, everyone communicates differently. To get an insight into what your partner values and how they interact, it is essential to explore the five love languages and determine which you and your partner resonate with the most.
These languages help get rid of any miscommunication that might occur and build communication as a skill amongst couples to help them understand each other better. The best part is that you can have more than just one love language. It could be two or even more. You do not have to restrict to only one. If you are wondering how to improve communication skills with your partner and which of the five love languages are you, then keep reading.
What Are the Five Love Languages?
Before we jump into the nitty-gritty, it is essential to know everyone gives and receives love differently. Relationship expert Dr. Gray Chapman invented the concept of love languages in his revolutionary book called The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts. Below are the five ways you can eliminate communication barriers and improve communication in relationships.
Acts of Service
This language is all about tapping into the aspect of your personality that delves with selflessness. It pertains to sharing the burden of responsibility with your partner. It is no news, all households require time and effort to get chores done. But sometimes we can get stuck amid busy schedules or just become lazy and burden our partner with taking care of everything.
The vital thing to note here is that though doing acts of service may not appear to be romantic. In its true essence, it is a loving way to express you care. No matter how small or big these acts are, you will be easing your spouse’s burden of responsibility. That will speak volumes of your affection for them. Five love languages acts of service examples include vacuuming the floors, taking out the trash, sharing house chores or picking groceries. These gestures communicate that you are a team player. Simply put, all individuals who value acts of love want to hear is, “let me do that for you.”
On the contrary, being lazy is the easiest way to disappoint these individuals. Also, avoid piling up your partner’s workload and instead try being there for them, daily.
If physical touch love language is the primary means of communication for your partner, then they adore staying connected with you through the sense of touch. The five love languages physical touch ideas include holding hands while walking, getting massages and anything that maintains a gentle touch with the one you love.
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Words of Affirmation
Who doesn’t love getting showered with endless compliments? If your partner adores unsolicited comments, then be sure to let them know how much they mean to you. Openly communicating your love, will make your feelings obvious and breed trust.
If these individuals do something for you, be sure to thank them. Gratitude, in general, is a cornerstone of any healthy relationship, but with these individuals, it is one of the most important ones.
If your partner’s primary love language is words of affirmation, then gratitude will be received with utmost love. Before long, you will see new positivity sprouting in your relationship.
However, on the contrary, insults can be absolutely devastating for these individuals. So even during arguments, be sure to catch your tongue before it slips out words that jab at your partner’s heart and create a permanent void.
If you’re wondering what is quality time in a relationship, then you have come to the right place. This means no cell phones, no chores and no TV to interrupt your connection with your spouse. Just giving each other undivided attention, so both of you focus on what the other has to say. Practice this daily to form an unbreakable bond.
If your partner values quality time love language, then be sure to spend time together, sharing meaningful thoughts, listening and communicating. One of the best ways of practicing this is by keeping date nights every month. Drop the kids at the babysitter, dress up for each other and head out to town for a lovely meal, movie or any activity you both enjoy together.
You can even set up candlelight dinners at home, cook and eat together while bonding over the entire experience. The idea is to make your partner feel like they have your undivided attention and affection.
The person who loves this language adores giving and receiving gifts. They put a lot of effort and thought into each gift they give. For these individuals, actions speak louder than words. When buying gifts for them, make sure to jog your memory to pick the right gift. It could be something they want, need or you think they would enjoy receiving. To make it even more special, be sure to wrap it up beautifully and make it a surprise!
This act simply tells your partner you were thinking of them and you cared enough to go out of the way to get them something they would thoroughly cherish. It also reflects how well you know them.
To some, this love language might seem materialistic and frivolous. But it does not require you to spend a truckload of dollars on extravagant gifts to please your partner. It’s the thought that counts, not the price tag. These individuals adore receiving unexpected tokens of appreciation.
Don’t forget anniversaries, birthdays and other monumental events on the calendar as these are incredible opportunities to utilize. Also, avoid giving impersonal gifts such as gift cards, as it subtly communicates you do not notice them enough to know what they would like or dislike.